Why I Hated Church

I have often wrestled with why I had such a profound distaste for going to church in my teens and early twenties. There were so many reasons, I have come to the conclusion that I disliked the whole process, start to finish, from getting ready on Sundays to getting back in the car when church was over and everything in between. Why should I have to dress and wear only “church” clothes or things that were “church” acceptable (pantyhose were a must in my house and I knew for sure these were made by the devil himself). I had to act a certain way, pretend to like everyone else, so as not to stand out or call too much attention to myself. Different in church does not mean better it means different. Besides fitting in, I never really said what I was thinking or feeling. 

“How are you today Kimberley?” “Fine” or “Great” was my usual reply. God forbid I actually told them the truth. “”Right now life sucks. My alcoholic dad left again, my mom is off her rocker, and my sister is a basket case. I’m hurting, alone, angry and confused.” Can you just imagine their faces? The whispers behind my back? The judgment in their eyes? The awful clichés thrown back at me? God never gives you what you can't handle, The Lord turns bad into good, maybe you are not praying hard enough” Nope, everything is just fine. Then my family would get back into the car throw off the churchy stuff and start bickering right away, until next Sunday.

I felt the sins of my father, the sins of my family deeply. In these years I never encountered a personal relationship with Jesus and I learned church was a place for the fashion police, mean old people, fake smiles, teenagers playing their parents for fools and the ever creeping feeling that I would never be good at following all these rules. I decided I did not want to play this game anymore. Church became irrelevant at best a hurtful place at its worse. 

After years of avoiding church people at ALL COSTS Jesus came a knocking. I opened my heart to Him but not without a fight… I was angry…with Him! Where had He been? How could He have let certain things happen? Is He for real? Will He keep His promises? Because if He was the “church” I grew up with NO THANK YOU! I’ll take my chances with the world. At least I don’t expect much from it. 

Of course God met my anger with love. I came face to face with a real God, a real Jesus. Now, I can never accept less than the real thing! We want, no we crave, authentic relationships that surpass the normal superficial ones that people settle with. Let's fill our churches with deeper, meaningful, and genuine, believers willing to love wholeheartedly, not surface level!  

"He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love." Ephesians 4:16

I Don't Like Cheerleaders

I am not a fan of cheerleaders, mostly because at face value, I do not see the point. Rarely do they make a huge impact in the sporting arena, to me, especially when I watch from the comfort of my home. Even the bows that are bigger than their heads tend to irritate me. Yes, they are usually pretty or good looking, their outfits are adorable, border on scandalous, and they can do some crazy athletic moves. But truly it seems like they can be more of a distraction and basically a mini-sorority, with lots of stereotypes attached to them, some well-earned. 

When my daughter was four, we were walking by my old high school football field; she pointed to the cheerleaders and said, "Mommy, I want to do that." My reply was what a very biased parent would normally say, "Oh no Lakin, anything but that! I want you to play a sport and not go around half naked. There is too much drama that goes along with being on a squad."

I can already hear the uproar from the parents starting to formulate all the arguments about the pros of cheerleading, which I know there are many and I can feel the daggers coming out, for those who disagree with me. But first, remember I can have my opinion. Second, I actually was a Varsity Cheerleader in high school and was in a sorority in college. 

But lately, I have been thinking I might be looking at the whole cheerleading thing all wrong. Instead of rolling my eyes in slight annoyance, I might even start to become their champion. Why the drastic turn around?  Well, a cheerleader's most important jobs are to get the crowds involved in supporting their teams and create a community of school spirit, both of which I LOVE!

In fact, in the current climate of mudslinging, name calling, lying, cheating, insulting each other over differences of opinions or beliefs, and general all-around unrest, I propose that we should start ALL becoming cheerleaders! We could become more supportive of each other on, help create a community spirit that cries out,  "Let's get involved together, let's UNITE as people! We don't have to AGREE on everything but we can be decent human beings to each other."

Maybe we can stop shaming and arguing about who is "right" and who is "wrong". Maybe we can stop rolling our eyes or being frustrated at others for our personal PREFERENCES and start celebrating all the wonderful differences that make us unique. Maybe we can begin shouting about ALL the things we are FOR, rather than putting people down for all the things we are AGAINST. If you want to go see the new Disney movie go. If you don't, then don't go. If you are a working mom or a stay-at-home mom, breastfed or bottle fed, voted for Frick or voted for Frack, like to drive Chevys or cruise around in Imports, recycle or can't find your magical blue garbage can (sorry), why does it have to be such harsh judgment and criticism of the other "side"?

Don't get me wrong, I played sports. I like competition. I actually claim the title of Reigning Queen Champion of Boggle and Scrabble in my home. (No one will play with me anymore because I can get quite "aggressive') I do not believe every kid gets a trophy or a ribbon. It's important to learn how to deal with not being first, not winning, or being disappointed. Competition is healthy in certain areas, but it is not helpful to pit nations, tribes, races, sexes, religions, or political parties, against each other just because we see things through different filters.

And yes, as a Christian, there are truths that cannot be compromised but if we truly want to follow Jesus we MUST really get to know His character. Most of us are not representing Him well at all with our hateful prejudices, misguided fears, and making people conform to our "perfect" image. Our job it to tell people the good news, and let Jesus change their hearts. 

So give me a, "2,4,6,8 who do we appreciate, Hoo Rah! Let's go Team!"

“Our culture has accepted two huge lies. The first is that if you disagree with someone’s lifestyle, you must fear or hate them. The second is that to love someone means you agree with everything they believe or do. Both are nonsense. You don’t have to compromise convictions to be compassionate.” Pastor Rick Warren

What's In A Name?

Names are powerful..think of Oprah, Nike, Ghandi, or Prince. You know who they are without hearing a last name. You kind of already know what they are about, what they stand for because usually people with one name have a loud and clear message. 

I know a name that is more powerful than anything. His name moves mountains. The enemy has to leave when His name is spoken! Darkness trembles at His name. Nations will bow down before him! He is the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end, He is our Savior, Our Hope, Our Healer, Our All In All, Our Deliver, He is the King of Kings, Lord of Lords, Prince of Peace. He is the light of the world! His name is so sacred some don't even speak it. Being nailed on a cross could not stop Him. The grave could not hold Him. He is the great I AM! His name is Jesus, precious Jesus.

Nike has a million dollar marketing budget. Oprah has a TV show seen worldwide. What does Jesus have? Who represents Him and His name? Who is responsible for making sure His message is loud and clear? You are! We are! The very ones who claim His name and call themselves Christians.

Why then, as Christians, have we let the most powerful name lose so much meaning? We wear crosses around our necks, put stickers on our cars, wear bracelets and t-shirts with sayings on them....and yet we have missed the point. We have misrepresented what being a follower of Jesus really means by pouring all our money, time and resources into the quest of worldly things while people are dying from starvation. We have taken what He stands for and twisted it into something ugly. Jesus would never picket with signs that were filled with hatred! We have watered down His message by the way we live our lives filled with mediocrity, unforgiveness, and selfishness. Not a vibrant, abundant, and eternal life! Why have we shown the world that we really don't search after, long for, or even truly believe in HIS name because of the way we act or treat others?

What's In a Name? Everything! 

"But these are written that you may believe that Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name." John 20:31