I Don't Like Cheerleaders

I am not a fan of cheerleaders, mostly because at face value, I do not see the point. Rarely do they make a huge impact in the sporting arena, to me, especially when I watch from the comfort of my home. Even the bows that are bigger than their heads tend to irritate me. Yes, they are usually pretty or good looking, their outfits are adorable, border on scandalous, and they can do some crazy athletic moves. But truly it seems like they can be more of a distraction and basically a mini-sorority, with lots of stereotypes attached to them, some well-earned. 

When my daughter was four, we were walking by my old high school football field; she pointed to the cheerleaders and said, "Mommy, I want to do that." My reply was what a very biased parent would normally say, "Oh no Lakin, anything but that! I want you to play a sport and not go around half naked. There is too much drama that goes along with being on a squad."

I can already hear the uproar from the parents starting to formulate all the arguments about the pros of cheerleading, which I know there are many and I can feel the daggers coming out, for those who disagree with me. But first, remember I can have my opinion. Second, I actually was a Varsity Cheerleader in high school and was in a sorority in college. 

But lately, I have been thinking I might be looking at the whole cheerleading thing all wrong. Instead of rolling my eyes in slight annoyance, I might even start to become their champion. Why the drastic turn around?  Well, a cheerleader's most important jobs are to get the crowds involved in supporting their teams and create a community of school spirit, both of which I LOVE!

In fact, in the current climate of mudslinging, name calling, lying, cheating, insulting each other over differences of opinions or beliefs, and general all-around unrest, I propose that we should start ALL becoming cheerleaders! We could become more supportive of each other on, help create a community spirit that cries out,  "Let's get involved together, let's UNITE as people! We don't have to AGREE on everything but we can be decent human beings to each other."

Maybe we can stop shaming and arguing about who is "right" and who is "wrong". Maybe we can stop rolling our eyes or being frustrated at others for our personal PREFERENCES and start celebrating all the wonderful differences that make us unique. Maybe we can begin shouting about ALL the things we are FOR, rather than putting people down for all the things we are AGAINST. If you want to go see the new Disney movie go. If you don't, then don't go. If you are a working mom or a stay-at-home mom, breastfed or bottle fed, voted for Frick or voted for Frack, like to drive Chevys or cruise around in Imports, recycle or can't find your magical blue garbage can (sorry), why does it have to be such harsh judgment and criticism of the other "side"?

Don't get me wrong, I played sports. I like competition. I actually claim the title of Reigning Queen Champion of Boggle and Scrabble in my home. (No one will play with me anymore because I can get quite "aggressive') I do not believe every kid gets a trophy or a ribbon. It's important to learn how to deal with not being first, not winning, or being disappointed. Competition is healthy in certain areas, but it is not helpful to pit nations, tribes, races, sexes, religions, or political parties, against each other just because we see things through different filters.

And yes, as a Christian, there are truths that cannot be compromised but if we truly want to follow Jesus we MUST really get to know His character. Most of us are not representing Him well at all with our hateful prejudices, misguided fears, and making people conform to our "perfect" image. Our job it to tell people the good news, and let Jesus change their hearts. 

So give me a, "2,4,6,8 who do we appreciate, Hoo Rah! Let's go Team!"

“Our culture has accepted two huge lies. The first is that if you disagree with someone’s lifestyle, you must fear or hate them. The second is that to love someone means you agree with everything they believe or do. Both are nonsense. You don’t have to compromise convictions to be compassionate.” Pastor Rick Warren

Not About You!

What if it's not about you? Those six words can be read and forgotten, easily dismissed. Yeah, yeah I know that, kind of, sort of, sometimes, but.. really? I don't want to actually live that way. Since we were babies we have liked our needs met. I want food NOW! My diaper changed Now! I want to be picked up NOW! As an infant we didn't know better, our whole world revolved around our instant gratification. As I look around and watch people, as I look in the mirror, have we really changed all that much? We might not cry in fits of rage (or maybe you do). We might not scream at the top of our lungs until someone pays attention to us (or maybe I do). But we definitely feel comfort and satisfaction when our demands and expectations are met. The faster the better. We greatly prefer things to go our way. It’s not too much to ask because really our ideas make more sense than most of those around us right? 

Don't like your car? Trade it in for more an expensive newer one. Don't like the service at the restaurant? Don't think about what kind of day the waitress might be having. Instead, get angry and sarcastic with her or leave a bad tip because she didn't deserve it. Don't like your friends? Move on to other ones that are easier. Don't like your girlfriend? Break up with her. There has to be a better version. Don't like your marriage? It has gotten way too hard? Get a divorce. The next go round you will do things differently right? Don't like your sex life? Cheat or watch porn to feed your desires no matter the cost. Don't like your job? Quit. Don't like your co-worker because they are irritating or annoying? Ignore them or walk the other direction. Don't like the worship leader at your church because he doesn't play the songs you like? They are too loud? He was mean last Sunday? Talk bad about him to others to justify your point or sit there and pout through the songs. You don't like the preacher's message? Or that person at church hurt your feelings? Stop going. Don't worry about loyalty or commitment. There is another church that might cater to your needs better. Don't feel like doing the right thing? Don't. Most people are so terrified of holding others accountable no one will say anything anyway. Many times, when our expectations are not met or conflict arises or something we don't like occurs, we simply walk away or quit or check out or try to find something different that is more comfortable, logical...just easier! Anymore, it's not go big or go home. It's get your own way or go home. It's get uncomfortable and go home. 


What if it's NOT ABOUT YOU! What if we tattooed this on our arm and thought about this every time we wanted to get hostile, angry, disappointed, hurt, irritated, annoyed, or things get too difficult? What if we kept our older car and instead used the extra money on sponsoring a child? What if we gave the tip to the waitress, even if she didn't deserve it, because she stands on her feet all day, raises her kids alone, and that tip with a kind word could change her day around? What if instead of walking away from friendships we have tough conversations and stick by each other? What if we stop looking at our marriages as ways to get our own needs met, tit-for-tat, and spent our time praying to God to change how we see our spouse to love them better? What if the relationship or job you are in is more about your growth as a person through hard times rather than your comfort? What if we stopped avoiding our co-worker and try to get know them, maybe even ask how you can pray for them. What if we don't like the preaching or the songs at church but we don't grumble or complain we go serve in another area for a while or pour into someone else's life? What if we stopped thinking, "What am I getting out of this?" and instead say, "What can I do to help?" What if we TRULY acted like we believe that Jesus died on the cross for our sins, even though we didn't deserve it, and our whole mission in life is to make it about Him and not us? What if?

"So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it." 

Colossians 3:12-14 MSG

This Ain't Burger King!

A few years ago Burger King had an ad out that stated, "Have it your way, right away!" While this is good for a fast food restaurant trying to attract customers and compete with other chains this shouldn't be our attitude about church. Too often I hear people complaining about what they don't like about church. I am not talking about the deeper issues like doctrine or core beliefs; I am talking about the non-essentials like the music being too loud or the preacher not giving the best sermon ever. One of the sayings that irritate me the most is, "Well I am just not being fed." 

Where did Christians get the idea that the only reason they go to church is to get fed? This ain't Burger King! You don't get to drive up to a church and expect it to meet all your needs exactly the way you want it. God did not make us helpless and passive. We are not called to sit back and let the church serve us in just the "right" way and grumble, loudly when it doesn't. We are not supposed to "shop" churches until we feel "comfortable". Comfort was never the plan! Sometimes God has you in a specific place, for a specific reason, to do a specific task for Him. 

This doesn't mean we shouldn't using wisdom and discernment in choosing a church. But let's consider for a moment that maybe its not about us. Maybe if we have been Christians for awhile we shouldn't be searching for "our way" but His purpose. Maybe God wants you at a specific church because He has someone for you to journey with, a ministry to serve, or a lesson to learn. Maybe we will bring GLORY to our creator when stop focusing on the give me, serve me, my way... but instead stop our complaining and say, "God use me YOUR WAY, ANY WAY, I am yours."

"These people are grumblers and complainers, living only to satisfy their desires. They brag loudly about themselves, and they flatter others to get what they want." Jude 1:16

"Their responsibility (pastors, elders) is to equip God’s people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ. This will continue until we all come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature in the Lord, measuring up to the full and complete standard of Christ." Ephesians 4:12-13

FIRE ME!

I was at a conference and they were talking about the importance of mentoring others. "Invest in the next generation, get personally involved, influence others in your circles! blah, blah, blah, blah, blah"... but they never addressed what happens when it doesn't work or you fail?

I have been investing in the lives of teenagers and college students for the past 22 years.

I have a Master's Degree, a Bachelors Degree.  I volunteered with Special Olympics, VBS, Youth Camp, Kids Camp, taught five days a week during the day, Wednesday night, and twice on Sundays. I was involved in Bible studies, put in hundreds of hours with students, phone calls, lunches, counseling, dinners, events. I shared my life, my family, my time, my resources, my house, and even my car.

Wow you are probably thinking how qualified, godly, and sacrificial this lady is….Not so much. Bryan and I have a very low percentage rate as far as people taking advice or being held accountable for their choices, many of the students are into drugs, alcohol, premarital sex, ignoring teachings, bad relationship choices, sometimes we barely see them anymore.

God it failed! No one listens. It didn’t work. They are selfish. I am a failure. Something is wrong with them, me, you, the world….Fire Me!

"Kimberley, it’s not about you." What?? "It’s not about you. You have done nothing! (Great, I knew it was them all along) Even the good you pat yourself on the back for, it was me working in you. In fact, you give yourself way too much credit for the good and the bad. These teenagers and young adults are my creation. You are in their life to journey alongside of them and show them Jesus in the way you live your life. You plant seeds, help them pull out some weeds, give them a healthy dose of my light through studying the Bible, and shower them with your love." 

"But the growing comes from me and only me. I made each and every one of them with a heart that will yearn after my Son...if they chose to try to fill it with other stuff the consequences can be great. I gave them a will and mind of their own. I want them to choose me to be their personal Lord and Savior, not by their church talk but by their life walk. Many, many will stray. They will choose their own path. Try to do it their way. Others will turn their back on me completely. I love them so much I sacrificed my Son on the cross for them so they could have eternal life with me in heaven. And still it won’t be enough. So please don’t get discouraged my daughter (and don’t be so full of yourself). It is so not about you. It is between them and me. You be obedient and love the ones I place in your path. I didn’t give you a job you can be fired from. I gave you my Son as an example how to love others."