Does It Even Matter?

"What are you doing right now that will matter 100 years from now?"

Talk about being hit in the gut! This question was posed to me in Bible study and got me all riled up! Oh my gosh what if the answer is NOTHING? What if nothing I am doing truly matters? What if I am just running around like Chicken Little with my head cut off, not accomplishing much, but ruffling a lot of feathers. 100 years is a long time from now, what lasts over a century besides garbage bags and plastic bottles?

According to distractify.com if you compress all the time into minutes, the average person spends over 2 years watching commercials and 9 years or 80,486 hours watching TV, 1 year cleaning, 3 months waiting in traffic, 67 minutes a day eating, 5 years at a desk and 90,360 hours working. Women spend 8 years of their life SHOPPING, over 17 years on some kind of diet trying to lose weight and 14,000 hours doing our hair. 70% of our waking life is spent in front of digital media and 90% of our time is spent indoors!

Ouch! We all know that we need to probably cut down on T.V., Facebook, Pinterest, video games, or whatever else we do that distracts us from truly living but these numbers were depressing! I was tempted to start writing down a list of all my worldly achievements to prove my worth, or at least help me feel like I haven't wasted so much time!  

I cried out, "God, God I don't want to stand before you and give you my list of all the things I have "done for you" thinking I am going to get an A+ or at least a solid B, but really you will just shake your head, with a sad smile, and say," Kimberley you kind of missed the point..." What AM I doing that will matter a 100 years from now?"

"Kimberley, it's really simple, Love God and Love Others! Love does not return void, even if is rejected, thrown away, ignored, trampled on, or only one-sided. All the other stuff the world has to offer, are only substitutes for LOVE. You can't take your money with you, your cars will rust, your house might crumble, the memory of you will slowly fade BUT THE WAY YOU LOVED OTHERS WILL LAST FOR GENERATIONS TO COME! When people are loved well, especially in my name, the effects are eternal. Love your husband like He is your greatest gift even when he doesn't deserve it, love your children, no matter what, pouring into them all my truths, love your enemies even when it hurts, and love the people I put in your life because I first loved you! That is what will matter when you stand before me." 

"Three things will last forever--faith, hope, and love--and the greatest of these is love." 1 Cor 13:13

Not About You!

What if it's not about you? Those six words can be read and forgotten, easily dismissed. Yeah, yeah I know that, kind of, sort of, sometimes, but.. really? I don't want to actually live that way. Since we were babies we have liked our needs met. I want food NOW! My diaper changed Now! I want to be picked up NOW! As an infant we didn't know better, our whole world revolved around our instant gratification. As I look around and watch people, as I look in the mirror, have we really changed all that much? We might not cry in fits of rage (or maybe you do). We might not scream at the top of our lungs until someone pays attention to us (or maybe I do). But we definitely feel comfort and satisfaction when our demands and expectations are met. The faster the better. We greatly prefer things to go our way. It’s not too much to ask because really our ideas make more sense than most of those around us right? 

Don't like your car? Trade it in for more an expensive newer one. Don't like the service at the restaurant? Don't think about what kind of day the waitress might be having. Instead, get angry and sarcastic with her or leave a bad tip because she didn't deserve it. Don't like your friends? Move on to other ones that are easier. Don't like your girlfriend? Break up with her. There has to be a better version. Don't like your marriage? It has gotten way too hard? Get a divorce. The next go round you will do things differently right? Don't like your sex life? Cheat or watch porn to feed your desires no matter the cost. Don't like your job? Quit. Don't like your co-worker because they are irritating or annoying? Ignore them or walk the other direction. Don't like the worship leader at your church because he doesn't play the songs you like? They are too loud? He was mean last Sunday? Talk bad about him to others to justify your point or sit there and pout through the songs. You don't like the preacher's message? Or that person at church hurt your feelings? Stop going. Don't worry about loyalty or commitment. There is another church that might cater to your needs better. Don't feel like doing the right thing? Don't. Most people are so terrified of holding others accountable no one will say anything anyway. Many times, when our expectations are not met or conflict arises or something we don't like occurs, we simply walk away or quit or check out or try to find something different that is more comfortable, logical...just easier! Anymore, it's not go big or go home. It's get your own way or go home. It's get uncomfortable and go home. 


What if it's NOT ABOUT YOU! What if we tattooed this on our arm and thought about this every time we wanted to get hostile, angry, disappointed, hurt, irritated, annoyed, or things get too difficult? What if we kept our older car and instead used the extra money on sponsoring a child? What if we gave the tip to the waitress, even if she didn't deserve it, because she stands on her feet all day, raises her kids alone, and that tip with a kind word could change her day around? What if instead of walking away from friendships we have tough conversations and stick by each other? What if we stop looking at our marriages as ways to get our own needs met, tit-for-tat, and spent our time praying to God to change how we see our spouse to love them better? What if the relationship or job you are in is more about your growth as a person through hard times rather than your comfort? What if we stopped avoiding our co-worker and try to get know them, maybe even ask how you can pray for them. What if we don't like the preaching or the songs at church but we don't grumble or complain we go serve in another area for a while or pour into someone else's life? What if we stopped thinking, "What am I getting out of this?" and instead say, "What can I do to help?" What if we TRULY acted like we believe that Jesus died on the cross for our sins, even though we didn't deserve it, and our whole mission in life is to make it about Him and not us? What if?

"So, chosen by God for this new life of love, dress in the wardrobe God picked out for you: compassion, kindness, humility, quiet strength, discipline. Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you. And regardless of what else you put on, wear love. It’s your basic, all-purpose garment. Never be without it." 

Colossians 3:12-14 MSG

What On Earth Am I Here For?

I have just finished my third time through the Bible study, "What on Earth Am I Here For?" by Rick Warren. For those of you who know me, I rarely EVER re-watch a movie (maybe Top Gun..don't judge me), reread a book (only parts of the Bible), or re-do anything! I am way too impatient and have so many other things I want to accomplish. So that I have been through this study 3 times is pretty amazing. What's so different about it? 

At first, it seems like Christianity 101. I should know all this right? I am a pastor's wife and have followed Jesus for over 20 years. But what struck me the most is the all the "A-HA” moments I had. Something just clicked! Pastor Warren answers foundational questions as to why we even exist. Because to be honest, there have been times in my life where I have wondered why God even bothered creating us. I have questioned why He didn't do a better job with humans because we can be really, really awful. I have sat on my bed and screamed, "What do you want from me? Really?" 

I re-learned that I was created by God for his purpose, so HE could love ME! I was planned for God's pleasure (worship), formed for God's family (fellowship), created to become like Christ (discipleship), shaped for serving God (ministry) and I was made for a mission (evangelism). 

Until we understand that we were made by God for His purposes, life will never make sense. And a life without purpose is a life without meaning. True significance is not about prestige, power, pleasure, or possessions. It’s about KNOWING the one who created us. 

If you live to be 70 years old, you will live 25,550 days. Don't you think its worth to find out what you are supposed to do with them, instead of getting to the end and realizing you might have wasted most of those days on many things that do not matter for eternity?

"For everything, absolutely everything, above and below, visible and invisible...everything got started in Him and finds its purpose in Him." Colossians 1:16 (MSG)

Puzzles

When my kids were younger we did a lot of puzzles together. We loved the ones that use the Photomosaic process in which thousands of small, colorful images are blended to create a larger picture. It was so cool to see it all come together!

I got to thinking about the outside of the puzzle box. Without it, I would have been very lost because it tells you exactly what the final product should look like. It shows how each little tiny piece fit together to create this masterpiece.

Then I thought about what if there was a picture, the outside of a puzzle box that could capture the sum of my life? All the little pieces, my experiences, relationships, my thoughts, beliefs, values, actions, even my hurts, coming together to tell the story of who I am and what I am about? What would I want that picture to look like? Who would I want to be in it?

This was not easy and a little uncomfortable to think about. Would I want some of the horrible times to be erased or hidden? What if I left something important out? What if the picture in my head looked different from the one others would describe? Because honestly some days, most days, I am just trying to keep my head above water, just trying to survive the daily chaos.

With tears in my eyes, I bowed my head and thought, “Lord, what is my life really about?”  ~~Kimberley, you can paint your life anyway you choose! But remember, you will have to be intentional because your vision for your life can get very blurry quickly. It is easy to lose focus and start living a different life other than the one you really want!

My Puzzle Box would look like this: I want there to be a huge cross in the middle with Jesus standing in front of it with his arms opened wide. I would be kneeling at his feet with tears in my eyes at seeing my Savior and being in his presence. All around me would be pictures of the people in my life who I have loved, who loved and supported me, journeyed with me, and touched my life, however brief. It would be a collection of snapshots of love! I wouldn't hide the ugly parts because for better or worse they are part of me, but I would make them very faint, in the background, because they definitely don’t DEFINE me!

The words at the bottom would come from Jesus, “Kimberley, well done my faithful servant. Your journey was messy and far from perfect but you fought the good fight to spread the news about me. You were passionate about your family and telling your story. You refused to quit, no matter what the cost. You spent your life trying to understand the beauty and grace of the cross!”

What do you want the outside of your box to look like? What does your life stand for?

“For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us new in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” 

The Plumber

The other day we had Jason the plumber over to finally hook up our sink and dishwasher. We had only met him one time before but we liked his work and were excited to get our kitchen put back together. As Jason was working under the sink Bryan noticed him looking up at the memory verse on the wall. He would glance at it every time he walked by. Finally Bryan said something, "Jason, does that verse mean something to you?" Jason said no but he wanted to know more about it but he didn't have a Bible. Bryan went and found one (we just happened to have a new one in the closet) to give to him. Then Bryan asked a second question, 'Tell me about yourself." Over the next hour that is exactly what our plumber did. He told us all about growing up with a mom who had him at 16 and spent all of her life leaving him because she partied. Having an addict for a mom and a dad who was never around, growing up on the streets of Pittsburgh, lead to a very messed up life. Because of his past he had trouble staying in relationships and making commitments. His girlfriend had just broken up with him and he was lonely and frustrated that his life looked like this. Bryan listened to him and asked if we could pray for him. Standing in our front yard we put our hands on Jason and prayed. As he left we invited him to church on Sunday night.

On Sunday morning Bryan texted Jason, the plumber, to see how he was doing. He said he ended up going to church on Saturday and GOT BAPTIZED! And he said he was still coming on Sunday night too. He was so excited he watched all the sermons on the series in Acts so he could be "caught up" and know what we were talking about this week. When Jason walked up to us at church that night he had a huge smile on his face and his spirit was definitely lighter. He was ready for his life to change all he needed was somebody to ask the second question and share the good news.

This should not be a fluke or something abnormal. I pray God puts a hundred "Jasons" in our path and we take the time, have the courage, and show the love of Jesus to all of them. It doesn't have to be epic. It might just be asking a few more questions, being a good listener, and asking them to come to church. This isn't a job for just pastors or ministers. We are ALL called to spread the news that Jesus loves them and wants a relationship with everybody.

“Go into all the world and preach the Good News to everyone. Anyone who believes and is baptized will be saved...." Mark 16:15-16b

To Shave or Not to Shave?

The other day I got into the shower and shaved under my arms and one full leg before I realized that I had not taken the guard off the razor. Seriously!!!! Here I thought it was dull and that's why it was not getting close enough. But noooo, it was brand new! I was so distracted and busy that I was almost done with my task before I realized that something was wrong. What a waste of time! Frustrated and feeling pretty dumb, I did the mature thing.... I threw the razor down and refused to shave at all. There that will show it who is boss. You might be saying right now, "Kimberley? Really? You are fighting with an inanimate object? Sticking it to the razor?"

I began to think what other areas in my life are a bit off or not getting done right because of my busy schedule. We often pack our lives with anything and everything. Most of it with good intentions but are we missing the mark? Are our priorities where they should be? If we say yes to something we are saying no to something else because there is no way we can fit "IT" all in. I promise that there are only 24 hours in each day, no more, no less. Let my yes be yes and my no be no but what should I be focusing on? How do I know what comes first? "God, you do realize that I work full time, I'm still in school, have three kids, a pastor for a husband, and mentor others?" I don't know what to put on the chopping block. Many times I just throw up my hands and quit because it becomes overwhelming!

"Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God." Colossians 3:1-3

God's answer...."Kimberley, if you really took a look at your schedule you would realize that some things are merely distractions to get you off track. One of your enemy's biggest tools is to keep you running around like a chicken with your head cut off, so busy, you are doing nothing well. Start each day with praying, "God, show me your ways. Today is the day you have made. Not only will I rejoice and be glad in it, I will obey and listen to your spirit about what you want me to accomplish. Set my heart on your will for my life not my to do list."

That night I was lying in bed with my son and he puts his feet on my legs and says, "Gross mom, your legs feel like a prickly cactus." Yeah, I really stuck it to that razor didn't I?

Finding Your Purpose

Finding Your Purpose

"Meaningless is like a black hole at the center of human existence that sucks up whatever we throw at it, empty as it was before.” John Fischer

It makes a big difference where you go for the answers to the meaning of the purpose of life. Our culture will assault you with the world’s point of view of purpose: to be pretty, wealthy, happy, to have the best job, house, car, family, vacations…it is all about you!

Finding your purpose in God, his call on your life, is a different journey, one that won’t leave you feeling empty, unfulfilled, lost.

1)    Ask yourself what am I passionate about? God delights in giving us the desires of heart.

2)    Pursue your passions with all your heart. Don’t accept mediocrity.

3)    Keep your perspective that God has a plan for your life. (Jeremiah 29:11)

4)    Do not be afraid to fail. Failure is not a bad thing- not even trying kills the soul.

5)    Always remember and truly believe that you are a masterpiece, created in God’s image, to fulfill a unique purpose, which nobody else can accomplish but YOU! (Ephesians 2:10)

 “I am not sure exactly what heaven will be like, but I don’t know that when we die and it comes time for God to judge us, he will not ask, “How many good 

things have you done in your life? Rather he will ask, How much love did you  put into what you did?” Mother Theresa

I pray that you search after God and his call on your life with all your heart, that you not be discouraged but be filled with joyful anticipation of the destiny God has planned for you.

What I Believe

I don't believe in fairy tales but I do believe in true love.

I don't believe in the bogeyman but I do believe in the enemy.

I don't believe in Prince Charming on a white horse but I do believe in great guys that might look like the cable guy and drive a pinto.

I don't believe you need flowers for romance but I do believe a smile and laughing together is sexy as Heck :)

I don't believe you should spend your whole life trying to be happy but  think you should seek joy no matter your circumstances.

I don't believe people are born evil but I do believe that everyone has sin that could corrupt their soul.

I don't believe in Hollywood's superficial portrayal of relationships but I do believe people are meant to have deep long term friendships without the threat of betrayal or backstabbing.

I don't believe people change by what comes out of their mouth but I do believe people can change by what you see come out of their heart.

I don't believe in perfection but I do believe in trying to do your best and let grace fill in the rest.

I don't believe in forgetting all the stuff that has happened but I do believe in forgiveness so you can be free.

I don't believe crying makes you weak, but I do believe healing can begin with tears.

I don't believe in pity parties unless they are very short term, but I do believe there is always tomorrow otherwise you might get stuck.

I don't believe that we should "accept" everything, but I do believe we should love everyone.

I don't believe in world peace, but I do believe in a Savior that will bring peace to this world when he comes.

Do you know what you believe? Or do you sway with popular opinion? Do you just believe in what people have told you? Or do you search after the truth? Do you wait for others to give you wisdom? Or do you go to the source of knowledge? Isn't it time to know what you believe by knowing more about who you love?

Matthew 24:43-45 "Understand this: If a homeowner knew exactly when a burglar was coming, he would keep watch and not permit his house to be broken into. You also must be ready all the time, for the Son of Man will come when least expected."