Lawson's Journey Part 2-October 2017 Still Sick

We have battled the gluten for 5 months. It is everywhere! I look at bread and baked goods with a different eye now. 1/50th of a crumb is hard to avoid unless we are very diligent.  We are down to three restaurants but even those are iffy.  Lawson has his own red dishes, cookware, new toaster and basket in the pantry. I read labels like a professional nutritionist, always on the watch for 'hidden" wheat ingredients that are under different names; (flour, bulgur, semolina, matzo, graham...on and on. 

But yet he is still sick!

His blood work came back great! His Tissue Transglutaminase Antibodies (tTG-IgA) went from over 75 to untraceable! That means he has been good at not ingesting any gluten.

Yet he is still sick.

We went and got him allergy tested...again. 90 skin pricks later, we found out that he is allergic to over 20 different foods. All nuts, beans, watermelon, broccoli, cauliflower, sunflower seeds, sesame, soy, eggs, and more. But they said to not to stop eating any of these because they wanted to see if the allergens showed up in his next set of tests. Yeah, that's not going to work for this momma. I will not feed him something that is causing him pain. We took all of the top 10 out of his diet.

Still sick.

So here we are, another scope, both ends. It's a terrible thing to watch your kid get ready for a colonoscopy. (Not pretty for anyone) But it has been more awful watching your 12 year-old son, lose 17 pounds in 5 months because he violently goes to the bathroom multiple times a day. He misses school, fun activities, and has anxiety whenever leaving the house. I just want him to enjoy being a boy! 

If you know Lawson, he has an infectious smile and an awesome sense of humor. He loves deeply and gets along with most everyone. And apparently he has killer dance moves (recent wedding we went too he killed it)! I have seen these health issues slowly take away some of his free spirit! Some days we just have to keep making inappropriate bathroom jokes just to keep him laughing. Our life revolves around poop...literally. We are hoping these cameras find nothing more serious. But no answer is bad too. It has been almost a 4 year journey!!!!  

Eating to him means pain. 

When the doctor walks out of the operating room, my heart feels like its beating out of my chest and I can't breathe. "Lord, Lord, I cry out. I can't do this! I don't want to hear the news. Have you seen this kid's smile? Hasn't he been through enough since he was born? I feel like such a baby! So many other families are going through worse. But this one is mine and my heart is breaking for him. This has been a year of trials and we still have 5 months to go!"

"Kimberley, we have been here before and my promises are still true. You can do this because no matter what the doctor says, I will be with Lawson and your family. My love never fails. It is a true and perfect love." 

In my head, I start singing the song that I clung to after Lakin's diagnosis;

I Have this Hope by Tenth Avenue North. 

I don't want to live in fear

I want to trust that You are near

Trust Your grace can be seen

In both triumph and tragedy

I have this hope

In the depth of my soul

In the flood or the fire

You're with me and You won't let go

But sometimes my faith feels thin

Like the night will never end

Will You catch every tear

Or will You just leave me here?

So, whatever happens I will not be afraid

Cause You are closer than this breath that I take

You calm the storm when I hear You call my name

I still believe that one day I'll see Your face

"Mr. and Mrs. Lee, Lawson did great! There were no signs of Crohns, Colitis, cancer, infection, or EOE. He is still showing Celiac damage in his upper intestines but it looks better than 3 months ago. There are white blood cells present in his stomach which means he still has inflammation. This could be why he is still struggling. We expect this will resolve itself after he has been gluten free for 6 months to a year. It sometimes takes that long for the gut to heal itself." 

Lawson is still sick but we are CLAIMING healing! He seems to be slowly getting better-ish. But no matter what, this mom, has a HOPE that comes from the DEPTHS of my soul, that in both the triumphs and tragedy HIS GRACE can be seen. 

 "Let us hold tightly without wavering to the hope we affirm, for God can be trusted to keep his promise." Hebrews 10:23