Breaking Free

Recently, Beth Moore put up 10-14 books on-line for free which I snagged up immediately. Her books are intense and sometimes hard to get through because they deal with deep issues. One of my favorites is called Breaking Free. Although I have read this book before and I am not a fan of rereading, the subjects she talks about are SO important I am going through it again and will blog about what I am learning. I have to share what freedom in Christ means to me and how so many of us stay in captivity; imprisoned by our past, our hurts, fears, bad thinking, broken filters, and our addictions, that we never truly experience the life God wants for us.

As I go through this journey, I invite you to travel along not as a spectator but as an active participant. Don't just read my blog and say, "Well that's great for Kimberley, thank goodness she is working on her junk. Her past sure gave her a lot of baggage. I am glad I don't have to deal with all that." Friends, let's be honest. We probably all have some things blocking us from living a life of victory. A life overflowing with all the joy, peace, love, grace, mercy, faithfulness, and everything else Christ offers us.
"A Christian is held captive by anything that hinders the abundant and effective Spirit-filled life God planned for him or her."

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." John 10:10

Dear God, bless this journey of claiming your victory in our lives. Open our hearts to hear the truth, block out the lies, and the courage to be faithful in our desire to be changed. Thank you in advance for the mighty work you will do in our lives. To God be the glory forever. Amen.

Just Hit 10,000

My blog stats said I just hit 10,000 views! At first I am excited because that seems like a big number. Is that good? Well compared to some it's actually small and compared to others it is more. But then I started freaking out...10,000 times someone saw my posts, read my inner most struggles and painful parts of my past. Did they like it, hate it, think differently about me? Did I reflect Jesus well? Were my words uplifting and consistent with whom HE is? Did I have a lot of grammar mistakes? Did any of it even make sense? Why should anyone care? I am not saying anything new...am I wasting everyone's' time?  AAAGHHH I can't do this!!! "God, I told you it would be dumb!"

"Kimberley, you know how I feel about you comparing yourself to others. What does it matter if your numbers are higher or lower than others? The focus is not 10, 100, or 10,000. Does it matter what people think about you or is it more important how I see you? Are you obeying me and listening to my spirit? I have a plan and a purpose for your blogs. Do you trust me?"

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6

Here is to 1 or 200 more blogs! I will write until I have nothing else to say or He says it is done:)

I Will Follow You...

When Bryan talked about marriage the first time, I knew I was nowhere near ready to be his wife. I had so much baggage to deal with and didn't understand what healthy loved looked like. Over the next few years, I learned how God defines love. Love means sacrifice, serving each other, being patient, kind, not boastful, proud, or rude, keeps no record of wrongs, always protects, hopes, trusts, and never gives up!

On our wedding day, I promised to love Bryan for the rest of my life. At that time I had no idea what it would truly meant to be a pastor's wife. I had no clue what the next 20 years would hold. But I made the commitment that we were in this together. I told him on our honeymoon, that I would follow him wherever he felt God was leading us, even if that meant we lived in a cardboard box. For someone who had HUGE trust issues and grew up without a dad as the leader of the family, this was truly a big leap of faith.

Over the past 15 years, I have followed Bryan in pursuit of the mission God has put on his heart. Sometimes to our family and friends the path we chose seemed ridiculous, weird, and often downright crazy! A few times we were close to living in a cardboard box! But I have never doubted that God was preparing us for each leg of our journey to get ready for the next thing He had in store for us. I have trusted that God has a plan for our lives and he has created Bryan to lead our family. 

Tonight as we say goodbye to Pantano Christian Church, our home for the past eight years, my heart was full of love. Love for the people who believed in us and gave Bryan the freedom to be the person God created him to be. Love for all the people who have supported us and trusted us to lead them. Love for all the volunteers who show up every Sunday and helped us turn Elements City Church into what it is today. Love for my husband for having the courage to do the seemingly impossible especially when so many expected him to fail. And most importantly love for God, who showed me that faith as small as a mustard seed was enough to get me started, trust was worth the risk, and love never gives up! 

Bryan, I will follow you wherever you lead us, even if that means to a cardboard box! Let's do this!!!!

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." 1 Cor 13: 4-7

Dear Miley Cyrus

Dear Miley Cyrus,

I know that you are an entertainer. I know that you make money by performing and any kind of publicity is great for famous people. I have heard you say in reference to some of your behavior that, "You were making history, it's no big deal because that's just who I am."

I can see you are "trying to reinvent yourself, and shrug off the Disney Hannah Montana image that you made millions on. You want to "evolve" and you thought doing something drastic was the best course of action. Your quote, "Every time I do anything, I want to remember, 'This is what separates me from everybody else,' I have this freedom to do whatever I want because I'm starting as a new artist now."

You are right, as an adult, you are free to do whatever you want..even if that means making negative impressions on millions of little girls who grew up watching your show and concerts. You have no moral responsibility when those same girls can't separate your new "behaviors" from the your old ones as a role model on a family show. The "old" you tried to figure out how to be a teenager and make the right choices. The new you sells empty promises of misusing your sexuality and outrageous behavior that will translate as being "cool". When all those 10-14 years old females start mimicking your "evolved" self and get themselves into trouble because they don't understand the consequences of dressing like that or "twerking" on the wrong person, you don't have to feel bad because really you are just an "image" right?

I also know, as a parent, it is my responsibility to not let my children look at stars in Hollywood and believe they should act like them or put them on pedestals. But to be honest Miley, I am a little sad to have to tell my daughter that the girl whose posters hang in her room and CDs she has collected over the years is no more. I am trying to help her understand that she is not allowed to buy this new artist's music or watch anything that you create now because it's not appropriate for her anymore. I am not mad, I know Hannah Montana had to grow up sometime. I just wish she didn't have to change so drastic that now she is almost unrecognizable and someone who I definitely don't want my kids to look up to.

From a Kind of Sad Mom....


   

Christmas Crazy!

This time of year can get pretty hectic with all the parties, kid’s concerts, present buying, decorating, baking, cooking, Elf on the shelf, Santa, advent, and all the other stuff that goes on with the Christmas season. It’s easy to get caught up in the whirlwind of activities to try to build memories for our families. We have the best intentions…really. According to the Facebook posts there are women out there they do it all, effortlessly?

But the stress of “doing it all” is just that stressful! Pile that on with heaps of guilt for snapping at our kids, getting frustrated at our husbands for not helping enough, and the exhaustion from cramming everything into our tight schedules and the joy of Christmas becomes replaced with the “franticness” of the getter dun mentality. “I will rest after December 25th.” Cause getting ready for New Year’s Eve/Day, taking down decorations, and starting our resolutions doesn’t consume any time right?

On the way to school today God spoke to my heart, “Kimberley, remember, It’s not what you do, it is who you are! Your family will remember the gifts of hugs, kisses, love, and time spent together. All that other stuff is not bad but it is certainly not necessary for your kids to experience the real meaning of Christmas. They are watching who you are more than all the great things you do for them.”

The birth of Jesus is the reminder of the hope and future we have because of Him. Joy to the world the Lord has come!

“Don’t be afraid!” he said. “I bring you good news that will bring great joy to all people. The Savior—yes, the Messiah, the Lord—has been born today in Bethlehem, the city of David! And you will recognize him by this sign: You will find a baby wrapped snugly in strips of cloth, lying in a manger.” Suddenly, the angel was joined by a vast host of others—the armies of heaven—praising God and saying, “Glory to God in highest heaven, and peace on earth to those with whom God is pleased.” Luke 2:10-14